What Is Your Vibe?
November 12, 2019 § 2 Comments
A fe
w months ago, Larry Arrance, an employment workshop facilitator colleague in Kelowna, B.C., put out this question on LinkedIn: “If you’re not spreading hope, what are you spreading?”
I’ve been pondering that question a lot since then and now is a great time to explore the subject. Co-author Wendy Peters and I have reached the 10-year anniversary of The Muse and Views, created to build content for an inspirational book(s). Larry’s query fits perfectly into our theme.
I asked Larry recently to spell out what his take was on the question. He responded, “For myself, I’ve found hope to be a powerful catalyst to get people to be open to positive changes. A hopeless situation or attitude causes people to take no action because it’s hopeless – so why bother?”
Hope on its own is an empty word unless there is action behind it. If I say, I hope to on holidays next July, there is no chance of that happening without planning a trip, booking accommodations and travel arrangements and setting the time and taking other necessary steps to leave home.
What Larry is talking about is a belief that positive things can and will happen through our own actions and attitudes – and further, that we will exude confidence to others.
As we head into 2020, it’s easy to feel less positive – there is economic, social and political upheaval in our country and around the globe.
However, the late great radio broadcaster Paul Harvey once reminded us, “In times like these it helps to recall there have always been times like these.”
As a communications consultant 20 years ago at this time, I was preparing content for a client in preparation of a potential Y2K catastrophe.
Guess what? Those communications materials weren’t needed. We moved smoothly into the Year 2000 without a global online crisis.
Are we going to get every job we apply for? No. Sometimes that’s a good thing. Do we get every house we put an offer on? No. We are disappointed but then find another and make a home out of it with the friends and family we choose to enjoy it with. Do unforeseen circumstances, good and bad, occur? Of course. How we react either way is what matters.
I appreciate the spirit of a quote by author Louisa May Alcott when she remarked, “Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow them.”
As this author of Little Women alluded to, not everything is going to go our way, whether on the home front or in the workforce. However, how we answer Larry’s question has implications in our personal and professional lives.
Negativity hangs over us like the smoke those of us in Western Canada are all too familiar with from wildfires. It sucks the life out of you and you feel uninspired.
There is a much greater probability of finding success and opportunities if we have a positive outlook and encourage others. If we’re negative and spreading discontent to those around us, the people who come into our lives will tend to be miserable and down on life, too.
Friend Lynsey Dalen has a phrase to describe this: “Your vibe attracts your tribe.”
Lynsey is an inspiring, driven woman who I’ve watched with admiration advance from radio advertising sales to associate advisor at Neil & Associates.
Earlier this year, she also launched Elle Bell Sales Co. which provides online sales training designed specifically for women. In addition to being a wife and mother of two girls, Lynsey is the women’s clothing buyer for S3 Boardshop.
Lynsey responded with tribe line after I posted a meme on Facebook that I told her reminded me of her actions and style. It cited Five Types Of People To Surround Yourself With: The Inspired, The Motivated, The Open Minded, the Passionate, The Grateful.
Indeed, part of your success in spreading hope is having other people to hand your torch to – like-minded people.
I asked Lynsey to share her thoughts on Larry’s question and the Vibe attracting Tribe statement. Here’s what she says:
“I’ve always been a believer in the law of attraction and that you get back what you put into the universe.
Our energy and our mindset matter because we have the ability to control those things. We can’t control what happens to us, but we can always control how we respond to those things. I 100% believe that happiness is a choice and it has to be a conscious one or else it’s too easy to get caught up in what’s happening around us and to soak up the negative energy of others. It’s not always easy to choose happiness but the result is always worth the effort.
That being said, I try to be conscious of the energy I’m putting out to the people in my life. If I were a negative, pessimistic and discouraging person, those are the type of people I would have in my life because they would feed off that energy. However, I CHOOSE to be a positive, optimistic and encouraging person and so those are the people I have attracted into my circle. Your vibe absolutely attracts your tribe and we are all the product of the people we spend the most time with so I think it’s important to choose wisely. Time is a limited resource and I have zero interest in wasting it!”
I thank Lynsey for sharing her powerful words. There is always hope. Will you join friends like Lynsey, Larry and I to help spread it? Together, we can make a difference.
Make Your Last Ten Your Best Ten
May 26, 2019 § Leave a comment
Last September I joined a HIIT (high intensity interval training) gym in Calgary called The 80/20 Hub. Three times a week over the last 6 months, I was through the door at 6am for a hard 45 minutes to start my day. Aside from strengthen our body, the gym’s main coach and owner, Deb Sousa, also encourages us to work our mental muscles, pushing past our own brain barriers to bring us past the finishing line rather than giving in just shy of our goal.
In the final round of our sessions, you’ll often here her words of encouragement:
“Come on, guys! This is it. Your last ten. Make them your best ten!”
Today, I ran my first race in over a decade with the Jugo Juice 10Km race as part of the Calgary Marathon. I’ve been sick the last couple of weeks and not training. As race day drew nearer, I was questioning myself as to whether the race would chase away this head cold, or help it settle in for a longer spell. By Saturday, I had decided it didn’t matter either way. I signed up for the race in January, and whether I was going to walk the whole thing or if I could muster the energy for a jog, I was going to make it through.
When you run frequently, 10km does not seem like a long way to go. Heck, even on a good hike day, my dog Beiken and I can come home with some energy to spare. But I haven’t been out hiking, nor have I been training much in the last 4-6 weeks for this. Towards the halfway point in the race, my breathing figured itself out, but my calves were starting to tighten. Around the 8km marker, they were screaming for mercy. Without endangering myself for a pulled muscle, I slowed my pace, but I kept up the slow jog as much as I could.
Not willing to give up, but definitely feeling like maybe I had done enough and earned the right to walk the last km, Deb’s voice popped into my head. “Come on Wendy, 1km to go. Make your last ten your best ten!” And while I was nowhere near the pace I started with, I persevered in my little jog, picking up whatever steam I could on my way to that finish line.
Like I said, my speed was nowhere near what I had started with. In fact, I don’t think you could categorize me anywhere close to “speedy”. But the mental strength I gathered to make that last km happen when I was ready to take a leisurely stroll through the last 10% of the course brought me into that zone of being at my best.
See, your “best” isn’t always about the same physical measurements. You won’t always beat your previous time or score. For me, it’s more about pushing myself just a little bit further when it would easier to take my foot off the gas and coast through the final stage when I’m “almost” there.
I’ve been coasting a lot lately in many areas of my life. Maybe it’s time to pick up the pace a little and make my next ten, my best ten.
Adapting, Advancing, Accelerating
January 9, 2017 § 2 Comments
“Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans.” – John Lennon
The above quote is one of my favourites, wisdom I’ve shared with others many times.
I’ve recently found myself practising what I preach with a new job at the City of Grande Prairie. I became the Manager of Intergovernmental Affairs on Oct. 17, through a small restructuring. This new position involves focusing on advocacy, strategic planning and, as the title would indicate, relationships with other municipalities and levels of government.
Up until then, my entire 34-year career had been concentrated entirely on communications, from newspaper reporting to corporate writing and editing, operating a consultancy, along with communications co-ordinator and manager roles.
There’s certainly a significant learning curve that goes with this position, relatively new in Alberta municipalities. Some duties are tasks that I would have done off the side of my desk in the past are now essential elements of my new position. Others involve skill building and opportunities for training.
My focus is more on City Council-related activities and priorities and our Corporate Leadership Team’s strategic directions. I now report to the City Manager rather than being part of a service area. I move from managing a team to having functional leadership responsibilities.
I was asked to take on this new role in a Sept. 8 meeting. Ironically, this discussion occurred immediately after a City of Grande Prairie Leadership Network Meeting where Leadership Coach Alan Goff presented on the 4 Rs to Remarkable Results.
He underlined that … “What got you HERE, won’t get you THERE.”
This is a reminder that we can’t stop learning, making changes, adapting to the evolving environment around us and being visionaries who will foresee changing circumstances.
Moving to a newly developed position within your organization has its challenges. It’s not like picking up and leaving to a job at another employer. There is personal transition and an extended period of passing the torch.
I’ve always considered myself somewhat of a mercenary – doing whatever is asked of me to complete a project, often with competing priorities. That was certainly the case when I operated my own business. I was routinely working around the needs and expectations of up to four clients daily to make things happen.
Reminding myself of this experience and that I had also pioneered the first communications officer position at the Huron-Superior Catholic District School Board certainly helped me to adapt. So did this quote from Ekaterina Walter, a recognized business and marketing thought leader.
“In the midst of change we often discover wings we never knew we had.”
Here are some highlights of Goff’s 4 Rs to Remarkable Results.
- Face Reality – Take responsibility for your results and those of your team.
- Relinquish what is in your way.
- Rely on the process – stay positive and avoid the ‘crabs in the barrel’.
- Reform to a better way – Change small, but often.
I follow the work of Tony Robbins and am fond of using his quip, “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten.”
I just discovered another piece of wisdom from this American businessman, author, and philanthropist: “Change is automatic. Progress is not. Progress is the result of conscious thought, decision, and action.”
These lessons are great advice as we embrace new challenges and changes in 2017.
Success is Different For Everyone
November 3, 2015 § 2 Comments
“Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do.” – Soccer star Pelé.
We took in the 36th GoodLife Victoria Marathon while vacationing in B.C.’s capital over the Canadian Thanksgiving Weekend.
Although I’ve never been a runner, I was captivated by the many storylines associated with the event.
Some were entered to train for higher levels of competition such as the 2016 Summer Olympics. Others were preparing for this year’s Boston Marathon. Others were first timers just hoping to complete the course.
There were 9,081 runners entered in total. Of those, 1,569 were competing in the Marathon, 3,855 were participating in the half marathon, 2,570 signed up for the 8 km course and 1,087 were in the Thrifty Foods Kids Run.
The star athletes stood out like in any sport. You could tell by their routines and the way they carried themselves.
As someone who played slo-pitch and ball hockey for a few years, I felt more connected with the participants struggling to make it across the finish line.
I do walk our dog daily but my strongest association with sports now is jumping out of my chair cheering passionately for the Montreal Canadiens and Toronto Blue Jays.
I’ve yet to set and fulfil fitness goals, having abandoned going to the gym on two occasions.
Therefore, setting a target to enter such a gruelling competition, regardless of whether it is a full-length marathon or a shorter distance and then reaching it is quite an achievement in my eyes.
Few reach Olympic glory. Some will enter competitions like this repeatedly to set better times and establish new fitness levels.
For a young friend, Jordan Skidnuk, it was a finish that would see him within two minutes of his personal best. But being one year removed from a broken leg, he was happy with the result.
Jordan has entered in marathons for several years, including being the youngest Canadian in the 2012 Boston Marathon.
His late father, Darrell, was a veteran marathoner.
Jordan’s girlfriend, Casey, eclipsed her previous best time in the half marathon by three minutes.
I’ve been thinking about writing these observations and how success will look different for each of us since returning from vacation.
This past Friday, I was inspired to push ahead.
I’d been invited, along with a couple of other colleagues, to share a talent at a teambuilding session with another department at work.
The department manager had heard I do readings of my writing.
Actually, it was the first time I’d had the opportunity to have a live audience for any of my creative work. I chose to read the story A Day in the life of Jasper, which I wrote for the Grande Prairie Public Library writing competition in 2010.
Since then, I have tinkered with turning the story into a book but have never made it past a second edit.
Another workmate, Arlene Karbashewski, read from her first book, The Treasure Kings.
I purchased a copy of the book and Arlene autographed it with the message, “May this inspire you to continue writing.”
This blog certainly hasn’t had the amount of entries from me over the last couple of years that I had hoped.
I learned that Arlene had only begun writing at age 40.
Sometimes people pick up talents later in life and, for others, it takes time for success to arrive.
Blue Jays fans were treated to the hitting exploits of outfielder/first baseman Chris Colabello this past season.
At age 32, he finally found his place in baseball after languishing in the minor leagues for several years.
Thankfully for the Blue Jays, he chose to sign on with Toronto and not take an offer to play in Korea this year.
Since turning that Jasper story into a book is a bucket list item, it was great timing to receive encouragement from another writer, a colleague who I discovered only recently is a published author.
It was also very cool to receive applause for a beloved story.
I couldn’t ask for better motivation.
Bucket List Or A Game Plan?
September 15, 2014 § 3 Comments
Being on vacation recently, I had a chance to talk to a lot of people – family, friends and even some new contacts.
Some of my older friends and family are in the throes of determining how their futures should unfold. Often, they have been busy caring for others – children, spouses and elderly parents – and have never really carved out their own niche.
A few younger friends are also busy charting their own courses, trying to weigh all the possibilities and capitalize on opportunities. One young marketing and communications professional has a small business sideline. Another is employed in the restaurant sector contemplating how to parlay her post-secondary education into a relevant career. A third is exploring human resources related prospects in between positions.
I noted that while decades separate the people involved in these conversations, one thing is common – bucket lists include some similar themes: world travel, seeing favourite entertainers live and even pursuing new hobbies or interests.
This got me thinking of my own bucket list and I determined that in order to qualify, entries must be achievable – without intervention of circumstances such as lottery wins or acts of God – thankfully I don’t cheer for the Toronto Maple Leafs.
For brevity, I have narrowed my list to 10 and there are some commonalities with friends, young and old. These are in no particular order:
- Bruce Springsteen is a favourite performer and I’ve seen him do a solo acoustic show but now I want to see him play with the E Street Band.
- Like my friends, global travel is on my list, but I will be specific: I want to travel to Belgium and Luxembourg – my grandmother and grandfather on my dad’s side were from those respective countries. I have no links there, but would love to see where the Olinger legacy began.
- I also want to travel to every region of Canada. I have yet to visit Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, Newfoundland and Labrador, Nunavut, and the Yukon so I have a great start.
- Now that I have begun going to the gym, I want to get rid of the pot belly.
- Eliminating my dependence on diabetes medication and pills for related afflictions, for that matter.
- To ride in a hot air balloon.
- For blogmate Wendy and I to complete a book(s) from the content of these blogs.
- My short story on my dearly departed furkid Jasper will be published as a book.
- Retirement to Vancouver Island. Joyce and I have travelled there four of the last five years and a few times earlier. It appeals greatly to both of us as a place that has it all.
- Finding another #furkid for our home. This is not just a matter of getting another dog. Both of our previous pooches and their personalities have been an integral part of our family life.
Now, of course, achieving any goal means setting realistic action steps.
In his Book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey referenced the second of these as: Thinking with the End in Mind.
Completing a book, for example, takes investments of time, money and courage – we need to be certain others will be as excited about our writing as we are. Similarly with Jasper tale, I have to take the necessary publishing steps, most importantly, completing the task of converting the short story into book form.
Committing to bring another dog into the home, likely a puppy, takes a lot of time and energy since we truly believe pets are part of the family.
Taking on diabetes with a plan of eliminating medications means a daily commitment to exercise, managing diet and controlling stress (the heredity factor is already there). Admittedly, the necessary dedication has not been there.
I must admit that health-related items really shouldn’t be on a bucket list. They should be musts to pursue. However, having them there helps to set priorities.
So, the question I have to ask myself or anyone else, what are you willing to do to cross items off your list?
Since most of us have multiple things we want to achieve, maybe we should view our bucket lists as an action plans.
Dream Cycling: Moving Myself From Thought To Action
September 1, 2014 § Leave a comment
Navigating a dream into reality is a lot like bringing a sailboat safely through the water! You’ve got to plan carefully, map out the terrain and expect to throw your timeline out the window.
It’s Labour Day and I just achieved an epic feat of following an incredibly long line of traffic through dark, foggy, rainy mountain roads. I was in Vancouver finishing off a road trip through BC. I had planned to stay until mid-week. But there’s something about the Labour Day long weekend that sets my wheels in motion, it’s the marker to the end of summer and feels like the right time to dive into new ideas–after a summer of fun and dreaming, there’s now just so much to DO.
That transition from thought to action is an important step for me. I don’t come by it naturally.
I spent a few days with my aunt and uncle on their boat on Vancouver Island this last week. They were teaching me about the tides and the waves and sailing their 45 ft sailboat across various types of waters. They talked about how much planning and work goes into manoeuvring their dream home through peaks and troughs of various wave cycles. They’ve got to watch the height of the water to ensure there’s enough for the 7 ft of the hull to pass safely over any rocks or other objects in the water.
All of that work and care they take to plan their journey through the depths, that’s the kind of strategy I take with moving myself from thought to action. If I left my mind to its own devices it would quite happily float up there in the clouds dreams are made of, bouncing from rosy dream to rosy dream.
Thankfully there are days like Labour Day. Ones that remind me to pause for a moment, come back down to earth and do some work in this realm.
And so, this day marks for me the first day of transition. The one where I rally my energy and my focus, carefully align my stubborn nature with my dreams and set sail towards creating what’s been simmering on my back burner for the last few months.
What am I up to? Well, a few things, but my main focus will be on exploring some pieces of history closer to home (think Prohibition and Canada’s role in smuggling alcohol across the border) tied in with a 4 week bar tending course I’ll be taking in Amsterdam in October mixed with my talent and love of the online social sphere. You can only begin to imagine what will come out of that, right? Me too! But I’m jumping in feet first!
I’m so very excited for the “doing” half of this year!
On that note… what do you know about Canadian locations where alcohol smuggling may have taken place? I’m going to need all the help I can get on this one!
They Call Me The Wanderer
September 23, 2013 § 4 Comments
Photo credit: divadsci1
There’s something about being on the verge of the next big thing that gets my blood pumping. Three years ago it was launching an incredibly vibrant community of urban explorers when I began my adventure as the Yelp Calgary Community Manager. Now, I find myself saying goodbye to the community I’ve built of some of the friendliest and coolest people I’ve ever met and embarking upon a new journey, one I’ve been dreaming up for more than a decade.
I’m a wandering spirit. I have been ever since my first trip overseas to Indonesia when I was 14. Multiple trips throughout my teens and early 20s shaped my young world views and inspired me to achieve my Bachelor of Commerce in International Business from the University of Alberta. I wanted to travel.
Many twists and turns and detours have brought me to where I’m at. Deaths in the family; the thrill and naivety of my youth that subsequently had me spending the last four and a half years paying off nearly $72,000 in debt (final payment last week!); various people and positions and jobs that have shaped my views on how the world works and brought some incredible people into my networks along the way…
David and I talk a lot about following our passion. I love to inspire people to choose their dreams and live them. The only effective way I’ve found to accomplish this is to follow that same mantra myself.
And so last week, I tendered my resignation in pursuit of my big hairy dream. Come January, I’ll be a wanderer, a wayfarer. I’ve fulfilled any commitments that once prevented me from going. Now, I wander.
It’s fitting that the first trip on my books is back to the land that first inspired my desire to travel. I’ll be headed on a “bucket list” trip to Bali as I do some work with a local tours company, Spices.
Stay tuned… I’m sure I’ll have many insights and inspirations to share as I make my way!
I Love You.
June 17, 2013 § 1 Comment
Today, I looked myself in the mirror and I wouldn’t budge until I was able to say something to myself that I’ve been longing to hear.
At first, the words wouldn’t come. Blue eyes were staring back at me expectantly. A lump formed in my throat. My bottom lip began to tremble. My eyes welled with tears. I wanted to look away, but I didn’t. This was too important. The blue eyes still looking at me, also red and brimming with tears. So long as I was there, they weren’t going anywhere. Try again.
“I…” I faltered and broke down once more. But with renewed courage I tried again.
“I love you.” I stumbled on the words at the end, but at least this time it was out!
I did it again. And again. And again. Until the words were loud and clear and resounding from a place inside of me I do my best to ignore. If I could’ve hugged the figure in the mirror, what an embrace it would have been. As it was, we stared back at one another, each with a grateful smile curling on our lips. I picked up a hand towel and dried her tears.
“I love you. I see you.” She smiled back. We’ve made contact.
**********
“If you don’t love yourself, you can’t love anybody else.”
– Jennifer Lopez
People around me are falling in love. And I’m paying attention. A colleague recently shared a scrapbook she made for her partner – full of words of love, affection and celebration. I flipped each page, looking at the photos, the mementos, the laughing eyes and faces brimmed with happiness.
“This is beautiful!” I said as I handed the scrapbook back to her.
Inside I thought, “Is this what people in love look like?” I’ve known this girl for a long time. I’ve never seen her eyes dance like this before. I think it must be.
My best friend and I have joined forces with another of our friends to complete a book study of Calling In The One by Katherine Woodward Thomas. 7 weeks of exercises and contemplation. At the centre of just about every exercise… you (me). The book is about learning to love yourself, because as J Lo pointed out, true love isn’t possible until we first love ourselves.
I met a man once in the midst of a messy marriage. As I listened to his story, all I could feel were the pain behind his words. A woman he shouldn’t have married, a house that wasn’t creating a space of love for either of them or their children. As we talked, I found myself relating to his pain. Not his situation, but the feeling behind the situation. As he told his story, I could see the parts in mine where I could take the initiative to turn all that around. Most of his story was about learning to stand up for himself and step into his light rather than skulking in his shadows.
I’ve done a great deal of work on my self-image and self-esteem, but I went deeper. I got right down next to the me that was still hurting and I watched what made her cower, made her hide, made her afraid to show her beautiful face. Anything I do that makes her feel like less of a person, I stop. Now we manage our eating habits, our spending habits, our relationships and our thoughts with much more awareness and intention. Because when I slip up, she hides.
I slip up when I’m not listening to her. She knows exactly what she wants, what she needs.
Last night as I lay in my bed, it dawned on me that I could give her what she wants.
“I love you, Wendy,” I whispered into the darkness.
This morning I woke up, all warm and snuggled in my blankets.
“I love you, Wendy.”
And then I had the brilliant idea that I should look myself in the eyes while I said it.
I trudged upstairs, hair a mess, bits of eyeliner still lining my eyes from what I didn’t wash off the night before. I looked myself in the mirror and I wouldn’t budge until I was able to say something to myself that I’ve been longing to hear.
Eyes brimming with tears, lips trembling, it took a few tries, but I did it.
“I love you, Wendy.”
Contact.
The Year Of The Internal Me
December 31, 2012 § 5 Comments
This year started out as… well, I can’t remember exactly what it started out as. It ended up being the year of the internal me. I worked long and I worked hard to uncover many of the beliefs that have been holding me back from being the person I so desperately wanted to be. The result? Self acceptance for everything I am, everything I want and permission to make it all come true.
The first of the indulgences I’ve allowed myself was getting my very first tattoo just last month in Saskatoon. I’ve been talking about it for the last four years. I quite literally wanted to put my heart on my sleeve. I had begun researching tattoo parlours in Calgary, but hadn’t gone so far as to visit them yet. I wanted the right person, the right opportunity. The “right” things in my life just seem to fall into place when it’s time (like how David and I met and began this blog). I had a feeling this tattoo would follow a similar path.
Photo credit: Reginald Tiangha
Back in September, my friend Dan got his first tattoo, his parrot Baub. I made a promise that I would follow through with mine before my 31st birthday, which is in March. Wouldn’t you know it, Dan and I planned a road trip to Saskatoon in November and he mentioned he was going to add some foliage to Baub while we were in town. His friend Baillie owns a long-standing tattoo shop called Eye Of The Needle.
“Do you think Baillie would have time to slip me in too?” I asked Dan.
A quick text message to Baillie confirmed that she thought she could do it.
I found an image of the anatomically correct heart that I wanted. The “real” shape of the heart reminds me to keep at least one foot planted in reality as I have a tendency to spend my time with my head in the clouds. We emailed it to Baillie and a couple of days later showed up for our tattoos. The heart took about an hour and a half to ink onto my upper arm. It didn’t hurt exactly, it felt more like many incessant and annoying mosquito bites. Every chance I got after that, I’d peer down at my arm. Yep, it was still there. It’s been over a month and it hasn’t washed off yet. I think this thing might be permanent.
I haven’t worn a long-sleeved shirt since the day my heart appeared on my arm. I didn’t want to cover it up. I’ve been doing that most of my life. Hiding my emotions. Pretending I don’t feel strongly about something when really I do… I feel strongly about a lot of things… but always trying to be the peace keeper. Trying not to rock the boat.
Now it’s out there. It’s out there for everyone to see. It’s my reminder to check in with myself regularly. To ask myself what my true feelings are about the situation I’m in, the decisions I’m making, the people I’m hanging around with. And it’s my opportunity to speak up for myself, to say what’s on my mind and to stand firmly in the person I am.
Now, with another New Year on my doorstep, I can proceed with creating even more of the life I want. Without a lot of the BS I used to tell myself along for the ride, it will likely come my way a whole lot faster.
May you also find the courage to be honest about what you want, where you want to go and the inner strength to make it your reality.
Happy New Year!
Resolving To Keep The Good Things In Mind
December 10, 2012 § 7 Comments
As 2012 draws to a close, many people will be thinking about their New Year’s resolutions.
I’ve already written that I avoid doing so. It’s more important for me to consider a given year in its totality rather than honing in on successes and failures.
Resolutions can have us concentrating on individual goals and milestones and if we don’t meet them, we tend to dwell on the negative. That is why I focus on striving to improve overall, personally and professionally.
To that end, I came across an idea that would help us look back on a year and celebrate the good things. It can take various forms but the version I saw was posted on Facebook by friend Jody Clark-Kettyle. You find a jar and each time a good thing happens, you insert a note recording it.
On Dec. 31, you open it up and reminisce about the awesome things that have happened over the past 12 months. I’ve also seen the idea referred to as a Blessings Jar. Blogmate Wendy has her own spin on it. She has a jar to insert notes to keep track of things she loves about herself when she’s feeling down.
We’ve all had setbacks in our lives in any given year. Some have been unsuccessful pledges to lose a certain amount of weight or stop smoking, exercise regularly or have better eating habits. People have lost jobs or precious people in their lives and these events can certainly place a cloud of gloom over you for months.
The jar suggestion made me wonder how full my jar would be from the past 12 months.
For example, I think back to April and attending the Elton John concert right here in Grande Prairie. The Rocket Man is one of my favourite performers ever. This joy would be added to by attending a John Fogerty gig in Dawson Creek in September. The latter ranks as one of my favourite shows ever – and I’ve been to my share of concerts.
In May, it was Anniversary Number 26. Although it was not the milestone of reaching the quarter century mark like last year, it did mean I’ve been married half my life. The better half!
In June, I attended a great Canadian Public Relations Society conference in Victoria where I connected with some great friends and colleagues and made some terrific new connections. This was followed by a fabulous holiday on Vancouver Island, a place Joyce and I love to explore. It was awesome catching up to family and friends.
In July, I had surgery on my right eye to address cataracts. This eliminated the need for glasses, except for reading. Shortly after, I bought my first “real” pair of sunglasses ever!
In August, my visit to the doctor revealed my best blood sugar results in some time. It’s three years since Doctor Muwonge chided me for less than stellar readings.
At that time he told me, “The first step to wealth is health.”
Also in that month, our son, Peter, returned to live with us while doing construction work for a few months. Although he has a busy social life, it’s a blessing to have him around for time we didn’t think we would have.
This was also the year I returned to volunteering in a big way, joining the boards of the Volunteer Services Bureau and the Council for Lifelong Learning.
On the professional side, we learned in late summer the City of Grande Prairie was the recipient of a Municipal Excellence award for its annual Municipal Government Day, an annual community barbeque and information fair that attracts about 4,000 people.
A significant career event occurred on Nov. 5 when we launched our Citizen Engagement Program, activateGP. This initiative has already had successes, including residents signing up to volunteer for City boards and committees right on the spot at the kickoff event.
These are the major occurrences I thought of off the top of my head. If I wracked my brain, there would be a lot more. I’d be able to include many everyday things that have made my day.
Friend Mindy Bush plans to implement the jar into her life in 2013.
“I think I would do the jar to remind myself of how I feel or view myself on a good day to build up confidence on days where it lacks,” she says.
Mindy is also considering separate jars for feelings and kindness she come across daily as mood boosters on bad days.
Grande Prairie resident Jennifer Upshall began using what she calls a Gratitude Jar two years ago. Here’s her take on it:
“It’s a large old mason jar with the glass lid and old silver ring from my Grandma, something and someone else I have gratitude for. The first thing that went into it was a thank-you card from a woman I’d helped. I know that maybe wasn’t the original intended purpose for it, but it feels good to be thanked for helping someone, and I liked seeing the little note in there. I think some days we all feel insignificant and it’s nice to be reminded that at least once we made even a small difference to someone!
“There aren’t as many sticky notes in there as I’d hoped there would be by now, but even the few that are, remind me that maybe things aren’t so bad. I start each note with ‘I have gratitude for…’ Most of the little sticky notes are about my kids making me laugh, or my husband doing something to help. Sometimes it’s about a hard life lesson. Regardless, when I see the jar with pretty bits of bright-coloured paper, I remember that even though I maybe don’t feel gratitude for something today, I did yesterday and probably will tomorrow.”
What great perspectives from these ladies! I look forward to keeping track of the great things that occur in 2013 and checking back with everyone to see how they fared, too.
The Muse and Views 