If You’re Stuck, Get Unstuck By Getting Unclear About The How
October 22, 2013 § 1 Comment
“All it takes is faith and trust… and a little bit of pixie dust.”
– Peter Pan
I had a thought as I was falling asleep last night. So much has been falling into place for me lately–and falling with little effort. My plans to travel are very quickly taking shape… as are the means to support me financially as I globe trot. As I lay entranced in that place between consciousness and unconsciousness, I wondered what specifically had changed inside of me to bring me into my life flow. As I pondered, a little voice spoke up and said, “You’ve surrendered to what you want… rather than what you think you should have.”
Once upon a time I was trying to make my way through life in the image of what others had told me was what life “should” look like. Go to school, get a good job, work my way up, buy a house, get married, have babies, go on a few trips, renovate the house, make my yard pretty, visit a cabin on the lake and work my way to retirement.
All I can say is thank GOD for the internet… for people with ideas of how life doesn’t need to be the one our parents lead, it doesn’t need to resemble what we’re shown in today’s media or the lifestyle our friends are choosing to lead. There are so many different examples out there of people who are living the life they’ve always wanted that it’s become impossible for me to think of my dreams as only dreams–they are tangible visions that I can turn into my reality.
This voyage that I’m embarking on has been the thing I’ve wanted to do for more than a decade. All of my efforts have been geared towards giving me the freedom to go. Even when I wasn’t consciously focused on creating the opportunity to travel, it seemed as though some part of me held on to that dream, dug in and gripped so hard I carried it with me through the years.
Even just a few months ago, it still seemed so far away… it was a dream I wasn’t sure I’d get to realize. That is, until I committed to it… I just didn’t know how I was going to make it happen. The secret is in the commitment. Get yourself to that point where there’s no way in hell you’re turning back… and surrender.
To me commitment looked like giving notice at my job and at the apartment I was renting as well as letting everyone I knew… I mean everyone… that I was headed off around the world and I didn’t really know what else the picture entailed… but short of illegal activities, I was open to any and all possibilities.
The minute I surrendered the mechanics and gave up any notion of strategizing and planning before I began taking action… the minute I opened myself up to possibilities I couldn’t even fathom, guess what showed up? The means and the opportunities to take me forward.
Writing, online marketing, social media and web design contracts, volunteer organizations, websites with workplace opportunities, people to travel with, people to stay with, offers for reduced airfare and other contra opportunities, travel guides in different countries, joining friends for weddings around the globe… and I haven’t even boarded a plane yet.
If you’re stuck, get clear about the dream, but get unclear about the how. Like a magic eye, when things get out of focus, sometimes you can see the underlying message more clearly. Open your heart, step into the thing or the way of life you’ve always dreamt of, take care of anything you’ve put in your way to hold you back (pay off, sell or rent your home… have that conversation with your spouse… decide to take your kids out of school and go sailing for a year) and soak it all in!
You can’t know what’s waiting for you until you open the door, step outside and take flight!
The Muse and Views 
In your blog, Wendy, you describe the typical life expected, and the one outside of the box. In your case, thinking outside the box was outside of your city, province, country and continent! For 10 long years you wanted to go – and finally, perhaps based on the quote in ‘Peter Pan’, and the other statement you wrote in your blog, you decided to surrender to what you want.
“All it takes is faith and trust… and a little bit of pixie dust.”
– Peter Pan
“You’ve surrendered to what you want… rather than what you think you should have.”
Absolutely, that was a way for you to get ‘unstuck.’ You didn’t know at the time you planned it how you would do it, you just decided TO do it. That level of commitment is a gift few people accept in their lives.
To make it even easier for yourself, you determined that you needed to place yourself in a point of no turning back.
I did this myself when I tackled my (unknown) fear of heights. I was 20 feet or so in the air on Disney’s California Adventure Park’s Mickey’s Fun Wheel when I took note that I felt oddly squeamish. By the time I was 160 feet up in the air, I was terrified, but ‘smiled’ through it all for my family, so the kids wouldn’t get scared.That was a long, drawn out ride, and I was horrified to realize we would go around to the top two times.
Imagine my response when my son then pleaded with me to go on California Screamin’ with him, since he was finally tall enough – It’s a coaster that has speeds of up to 89 km per hour, a 108 foot drop, and one loop. My husband couldn’t go, because of his back issues, so I was the lucky winner. Having never been on a roller coaster and realizing that I feared heights didn’t make it easier to decide – but one look on my son’s face and I was determined to put one foot in front of the other. I could not believe when I was at the point of no return, but I knew it needed to be so, to go through with it. I was widely aware that only creating a point of no return would make me do it. It felt as though I were in a dream.
So, I bit the bullet and just did it. Not only did I survive the ride, but I loved it! Turns out, it is easier to be up high, whilst going fast, ha! The music piped through each coaster cart is engaging and makes the ride more worthwhile. Mickey’s Fun Wheel remains a tricky feat for me, but I force myself every time we have been in Anaheim, California, to ride it, with the reasoning that if I don’t get up there, I will miss ALL of the gorgeous sights.
Life is like that – If you miss an opportunity you miss out on so much! TOO much!
In your case of world travel, opportunities abounded as soon as you threw all caution to the wind and just put it right out there that you were going. You worked hard at it and it paid off!
The following three statements you made are thought provoking, excellent guidelines to follow:
“If you’re stuck, get clear about the dream, but get unclear about the how.”
“Open your heart, step into the thing or the way of life you’ve always dreamt of.”
I agree with you: “You can’t know what’s waiting for you until you open the door, step outside and take flight!”
Unless you try, you will never really know.